Dominik Pucek

I have always been intrigued by deja vu. I don't remember the first time I experienced it, but I experience it a few times a year, and each time I don't really feel a fear come over anymore, more of a comfort. I think this is because I've rationalized the whole thing, analyzed it as hard as I could, and thus took the mysticism out of it. It has lost its quality to me as prophecy, or precognition. Its also been scientifically explained as an anomaly of memory/vision, perhaps related to stress. Interesting, but boring, maybe. As a matter of fact, I had deja vu twice this week. I feel the scientific answer is right. Why?

In Blue and Gold again. Just me and Boris this time. It had been hard since Jo-Jo'd left for Australia. Especially since it meant it was over with Pete, just at it had been over with Boris. Now she'd left the two boys to sort it all out for themselves and, well, you wonder who's problem it really was.

Years ago, in the 90's, Metallica released a video for One, a song they wrote inspired by a movie/book called Johnny Got His Gun. The video features clips from this movie about a man who had gone to the war, survived a bombing, but was left without arms or legs, sight, hearing and speech. I thought that was one of the most horrific things you could possibly experience - being trapped within the mind completely.

So apparently out of body experiences can be induced (I sent you all an article about this, come on, reconstruct - you remember). Isn't that ridiculous? And amazing. Our bodies are wonderfully brilliant organic machines aren't they?

Right before I sleep I hear things. I mean, I’m not sure. I think I hear them. No one’s there. I must be thinking them right? I can feel them rush on me, phantoms bearing down, breathing in my ear. Usually I can make them float away. Sometimes they don’t and I can’t keep the thoughts from screaming, stealing my very breath, the air around me vacuuming away like hands over my throat, through my chest. I drown and I drown until I scramble and crawl out of bed and get the lights up. Another red bull keeping me on until day light.

Mr. David McCabe makes an interesting point that I would like to expicate here that heads in a completely different yet not unrelated direction. A broad and expansive view of the process he suggests is necessary and inevitable to making progress. Does it relate to consciousness?

I want to commit myself to an investigation in the appeal of Metal, that is, the music, the culture, the art, the combined experience of each element. Being a metal fan, these things are all second nature to me, so when Prof. Tougaw suggested that this could be a compelling project, initially I rejected it. Why? Because there is a stereotype applied to the people who comprise the metal world - that of the mosh pitting knucklehead who still lives with his Mom. My sort of thought process was "why analyze something that doesn't want and doesn't need analysis?"

I really liked this piece. Steen's slant on why we enjoy aesthetics so is a compelling read. He gets down to the bare bones of looking at why something seen could be so pleasing, and what kind of specific truths, precarious as they are, that process elucidates.